I know the effects of going off my meds and stuff and how dangerous that can be but yet I also know that I don't feel like myself anymore since the meds and I'm sick of it. I know if I go off the meds I will lose to the battle of suicide since last time I almost did and hurt my body so bad from it and I don't want to do that but at the same time I don't want to take pills all the time and be controlled by them. Any advice??