5/9/13

In such a bad place right now. for a few weeks I've been so very emotional. One minute I'm crying and the next I am rolling on the floor in hysterical laughter because of the things some of my friends post on facebook.
Went shopping last week..I'm the queen of retail therapy..Clerk asked if I was ready for Mother's Day. I almost lost it. Sitting here crying just typing this. This will be the 4th Mother's day without her. I dont remember it being this hard last year. My father died in january, but why would that make me cry about Mother's Day? of course, I also get upset about Father's day. And my dad would have been 80 this coming July, soo. My brother is getting married. This is HUGE news because we never thought he would (well, my sis insists she knoew he would of course but ..yeah right). My parents would be getting such a kick out of it. Hard to read about the details as they get settled. I'm so very happy for him and I love her to death, but still i cry. Talked to my sis and she said she's having the same problem and so is my brother (the one getting married). Yesterday I went to a retirement lunch for a woman in my office. I like her but we are not close. They started doing speeches and I had to leave. It wasn't that I was sad about her. it's jsut that the least little thing sets me off. My sis went to the cemetary and put flowers on my parents grave. She posted a pic. First pic I've seen of the stone and It's just unbearable to see.
LOL on the other hand I have some loony tune friends in Arkansas. One just traded a cheesecake (she is an awesome baker) for a Nigerian dwarf goat. it's really cute but..hahaha it lives in the house right now. Has a dog kennel. Has to be bottle fed. She rocks it to sleep. It thinks it's a dog because it hangs out with her dogs. The other night she was trying to put one of the dog's coats on the goat (Dr. Suess anyone). It didnt want to go outside and do its business because it was cold outside...and this goes on and on..I think there is something in the water up there cause they are all certifiably nuts. I get to laughing so hard I can't even catch my breath.
So that's the roller coaster I am on. Dreading this weekend, but like my therapist says, just gotta get through it any way i can.
Ex called last night to tell me I'd received a jury summons. Wanted me to come get it so he could show me something. Have no idea why he thinks I have any interest in the work he's doing on the house. The work he wouldn't do for me but does do to get the house ready for when #4 moves here.
Ah well, ob la di ob la da life goes on bra..