5/18/2013
I don't know. Woke up early (for a Saturday) and had a headache, so took an aspirin and went back to sleep. Woke up 3 hours later. Still had headache and wanted to stay in bed..but made myself get up instead of giving in to the temptations. Still not sure I shouldn't have just gone with the original plan, though-LOL. Decided yes, I would go look at the puppies. Yes, he would be in the area but that did not mean I had to look at him or interact with him in any way. The "puppies" were all grown so there was no temptation there. Did buy some stuff at one on the other tables. He was there at his booth of course, but he didn't have his buddy with him..no matter. I did not go over there so there was not interaction at all. Have no idea if he saw me and doesn't matter anyway. got haircut-major disaster...ugh..a couple other normal that's life kinda things but I will live. Hair will grow out and not important in the scheme of things. Trying to get things ready for church tomorrow. This is a big thing for me to do and I can already feel myself coming up with excuses for why I can't this week and need to wait till next week. Finding a church where I feel at home and comfortable is a major part of my "It's a whole new life" plan. There was a time when I was very involved and it was an important part of my life. I would like to revive some of that.
Still fighting tears. constantly. I'm always on the verge of tears. and I just dont know why. Really, I don't. I keep saying it's mom, or dad, or whatever..but..I'm not sure. I don't think it's him either. The least little thing can put me to tears... I have been off my meds..but that's never resulted in this before...bothers me a great deal.
Ah well, gonna call it a night and get things ready for tomorrow. See if I can doing anything with this hair...if not..I'll just spike it and leave it at that..LOL.
Nope, not gonna make it....Looked at their website and pics of the seniors group and activities. sigh can we say old and boring? I've noticed this before: yeah i am 58 and I'm considered a senior..but DANG! I want more than a once a month luncheon that's held during the middle of a WORKDAY! Or going to sing at nursing homes. or "sometimes" being able to go on a trip to what looks like a garden...And they all look so much older than me.
Still fighting tears. constantly. I'm always on the verge of tears. and I just dont know why. Really, I don't. I keep saying it's mom, or dad, or whatever..but..I'm not sure. I don't think it's him either. The least little thing can put me to tears... I have been off my meds..but that's never resulted in this before...bothers me a great deal.
Ah well, gonna call it a night and get things ready for tomorrow. See if I can doing anything with this hair...if not..I'll just spike it and leave it at that..LOL.
Nope, not gonna make it....Looked at their website and pics of the seniors group and activities. sigh can we say old and boring? I've noticed this before: yeah i am 58 and I'm considered a senior..but DANG! I want more than a once a month luncheon that's held during the middle of a WORKDAY! Or going to sing at nursing homes. or "sometimes" being able to go on a trip to what looks like a garden...And they all look so much older than me.
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