Empty

I want to go to LasVegas, I want to walk the casinos, I want to see the lights, I want to eat at the buffet. Yet, I don’t want to do any of those things without a hand to hold or without hugs that are real. Please, don’t invite me on your vacations. I don’t want to see the sights; I want to feel them again. I want to live again, but I am so empty now. They say I will have a “new normal” but I don’t want it, if it’s empty. I am so empty now. Will I become even emptier? How empty can you get?
The one who made me, not alone, not empty is gone forever.