Update
seems I dont get on here enough these days.
Am not doing so good, psychotic thoughts getting really bad...I want to kill someone...I want to smash myself with a hammer till I cant feel anymore...i want to just go to sleep and not wake up....I am so over all this crap....why do I think this sort of stuff..am scared that I might act out on one of these thoughts some day.....and that would be really terrible....these thoughts making me so restless....cant sit still but cant concentrate enough to even get the house work done....i deserve to be dead...i am such a waste of space....my husband and children deserve so much better....psych dr answer is put meds up yet again...that will fix it...yeah sure thing...why didnt i think of that...i dont want to be on a whole heap of meds the rest of my life....I want off all of them NOW.
meds update.
Pristiq-- 200mg - morning
Abilify---10mg -morning (will increase over next few weeks to 20mg?)
Seroquel-100mg- morning- (more throughout the day if needed)
Seroquel-400mg- night
Am not doing so good, psychotic thoughts getting really bad...I want to kill someone...I want to smash myself with a hammer till I cant feel anymore...i want to just go to sleep and not wake up....I am so over all this crap....why do I think this sort of stuff..am scared that I might act out on one of these thoughts some day.....and that would be really terrible....these thoughts making me so restless....cant sit still but cant concentrate enough to even get the house work done....i deserve to be dead...i am such a waste of space....my husband and children deserve so much better....psych dr answer is put meds up yet again...that will fix it...yeah sure thing...why didnt i think of that...i dont want to be on a whole heap of meds the rest of my life....I want off all of them NOW.
meds update.
Pristiq-- 200mg - morning
Abilify---10mg -morning (will increase over next few weeks to 20mg?)
Seroquel-100mg- morning- (more throughout the day if needed)
Seroquel-400mg- night
Replies
I would love to hug you. I want to say first of all, that you are not wasted space. The Lord sees you as so special. Second, I DID take a hammer and pound on my chest 5 years ago. I was frustrated with an implant I had and I tried to cut it out of me. It got me in the hospital and diagnosed with bi-polar disorder.There are more details about this on http://hopeworkscommunity.wordpress.com. The article is titled the elephant in the room. Third, Youa re right to feel angry about being overmedicated. I have been all my life til 6 months ago. Keep trying what works and decrease the ones that don\'t--gradually, and with a dr supervision. It can be done, it\'s just a frustrating battle. Hang in there. I\'ll be praying.