Update

seems I dont get on here enough these days.
Am not doing so good, psychotic thoughts getting really bad...I want to kill someone...I want to smash myself with a hammer till I cant feel anymore...i want to just go to sleep and not wake up....I am so over all this crap....why do I think this sort of stuff..am scared that I might act out on one of these thoughts some day.....and that would be really terrible....these thoughts making me so restless....cant sit still but cant concentrate enough to even get the house work done....i deserve to be dead...i am such a waste of space....my husband and children deserve so much better....psych dr answer is put meds up yet again...that will fix it...yeah sure thing...why didnt i think of that...i dont want to be on a whole heap of meds the rest of my life....I want off all of them NOW.
 
meds update.
Pristiq-- 200mg - morning
Abilify---10mg -morning (will increase over next few weeks to 20mg?)
Seroquel-100mg- morning- (more throughout the day if needed)
Seroquel-400mg- night