An update eh?
I really don't want to. I feel too much of my life stinks. I make some stupid choices. I'm tired of being sore and tired.
Okay, now that I got that off my heart.... My life stinks comes from the dingy falling apart house I've had my family in because of a dream I had to build a plant nursery. I'm doing it for the family I told myself. Turns out none of the family wanted it.
Surprisingly though my youngest boy didn't want us to let the place go through bankruptcy. He has too many great memories here. Just found out my youngest daughter wrote about her growing up here for a high school class. Her classmates thought she had an incredible childhood. Wow! Those things gave me a nice slap in the face. Just like many posts on here.
My current dream of publishing my books has trouble from my own negativism. I start to wallow in the depths of doubt and uncertainty. Can I really do this and will it be good. I so do appreciate everyone on here for encouraging me to get off my doubting butt and self built depression and try.
I'm working as I have time and energy on my manuscripts nth rewrite. I'm dreaming about the story again. Don't know if that helps my sleep and energy. Before I go to sleep I'm thinking about the story, it goes across many manuscripts I have in the works. That, I know isn't helping my sleep. That is the way it is with something you have to do.
Thanks to all for helping me to see what I have to do and really it is something I love to do. I love the story. Even after having worked on it for two years and many versions. Thanks to all for reading this collection of words and good luck to all for what you have to/ love to do.
I really don't want to. I feel too much of my life stinks. I make some stupid choices. I'm tired of being sore and tired.
Okay, now that I got that off my heart.... My life stinks comes from the dingy falling apart house I've had my family in because of a dream I had to build a plant nursery. I'm doing it for the family I told myself. Turns out none of the family wanted it.
Surprisingly though my youngest boy didn't want us to let the place go through bankruptcy. He has too many great memories here. Just found out my youngest daughter wrote about her growing up here for a high school class. Her classmates thought she had an incredible childhood. Wow! Those things gave me a nice slap in the face. Just like many posts on here.
My current dream of publishing my books has trouble from my own negativism. I start to wallow in the depths of doubt and uncertainty. Can I really do this and will it be good. I so do appreciate everyone on here for encouraging me to get off my doubting butt and self built depression and try.
I'm working as I have time and energy on my manuscripts nth rewrite. I'm dreaming about the story again. Don't know if that helps my sleep and energy. Before I go to sleep I'm thinking about the story, it goes across many manuscripts I have in the works. That, I know isn't helping my sleep. That is the way it is with something you have to do.
Thanks to all for helping me to see what I have to do and really it is something I love to do. I love the story. Even after having worked on it for two years and many versions. Thanks to all for reading this collection of words and good luck to all for what you have to/ love to do.
Replies
Hang in there and keep on trying. Its wonderful to have something you love so much you dream about it. Don\'t let go of that.
Hey there Tim, don\'t be too hard on yourself now.You are a devoted husband, father and grandfather, and it is obvious to me you are also sensitive and kind hearted.So that already makes you a successful human being.Material things are given to us and taken from us, they are all temporary.However developing spiritual qualities, and I am not referring to religion, but qualities of love, empathy, human kindness, humbleness, free of envy etc etc are permanent.I admire your dedication and commitment to your writing and wish all success for you.If however, it does not manifest in the desired outcome, you must also value the endeavor. The journey is always significant. Also your house may not be a beautiful castle but it is your home.I lost my beautiful home about six yrs ago, had to sell it and then my husband declared bankruptcy. This illness caused the loss of all our material security, gorgeous new house, our shop, credit cards, savings etc.However, I have learnt to value many things in life, that previously seemed insignificant. It is all part of my journey and spiritual growth. Hang in there my friend, I wish you well xox