Well, the worst is over now.  I feel human again.  Back in DS bigtime and back in my game.  I think I'm still going to take one more day off from work just so I don't get weird and colapse or any of that kind of embarrasing stuff. It is so hard on these boards when you can't seem to reach people.  Some people are here because they just need to know that someone cares, and they buck up right away.  Others are here because they somehow feel the need to announce their intention to kill themselves to someone, and nothing you can do or say is going to change their mind.  Some, I'm sure, play head games.  I wish I could tell who and which.  Someone implied she was going to do something tonight despite our help.  I used 3 good posts on her and even got a hug from her.  I got the impression that she wasn't totally serious when she said "bye bye", but who knows?  Will I ever know? The blind leading the blind through triage.  Suicidals can be soul sucking in these groups.  Tonight was bad that way.  I think I made a difference in a couple of cases.  That's what it's all about, I guess Good night.