Today
Today I have turned 43 years old. I am trying to keep my smile as my husband wished me a happy birthday this morning and gave me $50.00. My cousin Tammy called @ 7:15 wishing me a happy birthday. Logan (Josh's girlfriend) sent me a text wishing me Happy Birthday and that she loves me. My mama calls next. Then I get to work and have birthday cards and donuts. Toni (My best friend) calls and asked me to step outside. Baked cookies, pedicure gift certificate and cards. I love all of these people, but damn it is hard to celebrate my birthday when Josh will never have another one. I have already lived 27 years more than he did. He has been heavy on my heart this morning and no one knows it. I put on my make up to hide behind it. Trying to put on a happy face is so hard. But that is what I must do to make it through the day.
Replies
Happy birthday to you and understanding the feeling of wishing our precious children could be sharing it with us. You are being celebrated today and I hope that you feel Josh\'s arms enfolding you, his mama. Sending you just what you need for today. Happy Birthday! Hugs, Joanie
{{{hugs}}} happy birthday!! love you!
Happy Birthday! Sending you lots of love & hugs today...Connie
Happy Birthday. It\'s hard to celebrate and always will when we have that void. I know Josh is doing his best to shower you with love and friendship from those around you. Soak up the love others are giving. Love to you. Robin
Happy Birthday. I agree it\'s hard to celebrate with that hole in your heart and it never seems to fill. I\'m sure Josh would want you to enjoy your day. Enjoy the love that is there for the taking, you can never have too much. Love and hugs Cathy
Dear friend, It is so hard to celebrate anything after losing a child. I sometimes feel that sense of why did I get to live longer than Eddie? I guess I won\'t ever know why at least not in this life. On this site at least we can be ourselves & not wear that happy face if we don\'t feel it. I like Robin\'s suggestion to soak up the love. In the last 6 months since Eddie died people\'s love has helped me. Even the love from my pets who so sense my loss.I just read your entry from 2/13. The beautiful white dove. A sign from your beloved Josh. How precious. For your birthday I wish you love, lightness & peace. Sincerely, Linda
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY RHONDA! I know it\'s hard to celebrate and be truly happy when we are missing such a huge part of our lives. It sounds as though you are surrounded by many who love you, that is truly a gift. I know it\'s not the same, not as you want it, but you are surrounded by the incredible love Josh has for you. Please allow yourself to enjoy YOUR day and know with every smile, Josh smiles with you. I love you dear friend!
Happy, happy birthday!!! It is obvious that you are loved by many...enjoy the day...Karen
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday, dear one. I know it is sad to be \"celebrating\"....but do it for those who love you. Josh is loving you and wanting his mom to have a good day. I hope you do.....love and lots of candles....dale, brandon\'s mom
The first birthday was the hardest for me and each special day a piece of my heart breaks again and again...
Happy birthday my friend. Hugs, Inga