Dear Josh, Today is five months since I have seen you smile, hear your voice, argue with you, and hearing you whisper sweet nothings to Logan. Josh, it hurts so bad and mama is having a very hard time lately. I can't keep you off of my mind. Especially reliving the day God took you home. But I wanted to share something you I think you would be proud of me. Toni and I were walking yesterday (yes "me" your mama is walking) and ran into Wesley and Jay Are. This is the first time I have actually spoken to Jay since him and Logan have become a couple. Well, I invited him to help with your road cleaning day and he had already signed up for it. He asked for one of your decals. To make a long story short, I emailed him this morning and invited over to the house to pick one up and to bring Logan with him. Or, maybe your daddy and I can meet them for dinner one night. I am trying Josh to keep an open mind. It just hurts like the devil, because it should be you. Part of me feels like he is trying to take your place. First your girlfriend, then hanging out with Wesley. Anyway, I thought you would be proud of me . Well honey today is payroll day and I have to get started. I love you with all of my heart. Love, Mama
Replies
of course he is proud of his momma!! you are such a strong lady and a great mother. be gentle on yourself this anniversery day and try to just think of the love.
love alissa
Love does not end with death, it supercedes death.Death only ends a life not a relationship. josh knows and is really proud of his Mamma and loves you always
The date each month is so hard-I think we all re-live it-every 28th of the month I remember that Chris was alive and I talked to him-and then 12:30 pm on the 29th hits and I remember that this is when I found out he was gone-I think we all go through this and it brings back so many memories-the first few months were just awful, it was not quite as bad last month-but I think we all remember every month.
The date each month is so hard-I think we all re-live it-every 28th of the month I remember that Chris was alive and I talked to him-and then 12:30 pm on the 29th hits and I remember that this is when I found out he was gone-I think we all go through this and it brings back so many memories-the first few months were just awful, it was not quite as bad last month-but I think we all remember every month.
The time of the day, day of the week, date of the month and other things can be such triggers of pain. I hope one day we all can be triggered by happy dates and times before the painful one.
Just know that he can see you and I hope you can feel him for comfort.
Josh is there with you doing all he can to send you peace.
Branden is here with us; sometimes we feel his presence and hear
\"I love you gram.\"
hugs and prayers