I seem to be doing OK today. But the more I hear about Mother's Day and watching commericals about Mother's Day the more empty I feel knowing my Josh will not be here. I just got back from the dentist. Josh and I used to go together all the time. My first cleaning since he died. Another hard first. The weather here has been windy and I am going out today to clean his stone. Josh, honey I love you with all of my heart and miss you. Your daddy and I are so proud of you. I went to see Granny yesterday and we talked about you. She is trying to get me to understand that God has a purpose in everything he does. Even taking you from me. I guess she is right something down the road could have been alot worse for you Josh. What nobody knows. What could of had been worse than you dying. I have read on this site here Josh about a mother hoping her child was not scared when her child left. Josh, I hope the same for you. I hope you had no chance to know what was happening to you. Josh, honey just remeber I love you with all of my heart and soul. Love, Mama
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my sister was just in a pretty bad auto accident and she luckily survived, but she said it went so quickly and she was not terrified she actually said when she knew she had no control she just got calm and sat back waiting for the truck to stop rolling. I am telling you this because it did bring me some comfort. my daughter died in a vehicle accident and she died instantly. I dont think our children were terrified I think they were calm if they were aware of anything. then they left their bodies and had an angel waiting for them. I know I am dreading the mothers day thing too. my first time without my baby girl. cleaning up at the cemetary can give us some purpose like we still have some motherly duties to tend too. take care love alissa