Feeling pretty down. Just about ready to give up everything. Just so tired of trying, and not having anyone in my life. All the friends I thought I had, both here, and where I live just aren't there anymore. I don't blame them. It is hard to have hope in this. Perhaps they have given up on me also, as I seem to be doing with myself. I don't want to live as an addict. It's way too much of a struggle, and I'm tired. I think I have given all I can, and I just can't see doing anymore. The main thing I want to take care of is my cats. I want to find a home where they can be together, and looked after good. After that , well, I know it's a cop out, but I think I just want to check out. I'm just too tired, and can't see any way out of this. All I ever wanted was just some peace, but after all this time, I've come to the conclusion that that just isn't possible. The addiction is just too much for me, and I don't want to live a life like this. I think it's better to fold your cards, rather than try bluffing your way through life. I know I'm a phoney. I want to play the part of a good person, but it just doesn't seem to be in my sole. I've asked God plenty for help, but I seem to be beyond that. Just very tired.

Replies

hope2168
hope2168

nope, checking out is not an option. you have choices to make. the cats need you and we here at ds need you. you are in my prayers. love ya lots