Last night Sheldon called and said him and Stephan were staying at his freinds. I think after I talked to Dillon, he must have talked to Sheldon. It was so nice this morning waking up to peace and quiet. I still couldn't relaxe enough to sleep in, and woke up about 7. It's still nice tho. I still feel a lot of worrying and uncertainty about everything. Seems to play on my mind a lot. I'm going to the Dr's this morning. Going to ride my bike. Mayby that will help me feel better. I hope so. Going to try and not drink today. I haven't been drinking too much. Mostly about four or five beers after work. I know it's not helping anything, but I use it just to shut my head off so I can sleep. I know tho, it's still not good. Just looking around here, and seeing all the mess really overwhelms me. I wish Sheldon would stay there for a week, just so I can clean up. I'm still a little scared about treatment. Giving up all I have again is scary. Really not sure at times if I want to really do this, but I know I don't like the way I'm living now.