Well, today went better than I expected at work. I didn't get hardley any sleep last night because of not having my medication, but it wasn't that bad. I still felt pretty good, and wasn't dragging my ass. Cathy came over and brought my medication when I got home. We talked a little while. I had some time to think about things last night between us. I'm thinking that I have quit a bit on my plate as it is, with Tim, taking on these bills, trying to get myself sorted out. I could see that things were going a little too fast. I don't mind having a freind to go out and do things, or have dinners together, but I'm thinking that we should keep it at that. She was alright with that too. I don't think I want to get tangled up emotionally yet. I know I still care very much still for another person, and I just don't think I'm ready to get totaly involved yet. I just want to have someone that I can do things with on the weekend or something. We have been doing that, and it has been fun so I think we will keep it at that. I kinda like having my own place, and looking after things here. There's no rush for anything right now. I think that she felt the same way. She seems to be settled in her place, and with her lifestyle, so well leave it at that. I must be getting old or something. Sometimes I feel like I just want to have someone and settle down to a normal life, and I do, but I also need to remember that it's very early for me in recovery. I have things I know I need to learn, and emotionally I need to grow some. Being in a relationship can be dificult emotionally, because our emotions have usually been stunted because of our using. Things need time. I seem to always forget that part, and want to rush right into things. Perhaps it's better to just give myself a little break. After all, this was my first date, of course it all felt great. To be told by someone they love you feels great. I get so happy when someone says that. It feels so good being told nice things after so many years of being called every name in the book, never mind the things I thought of myself. So I think I'm going to just take it easy, and enjoy my journey with God. That can also be hard trying to build a relationship with God. Sometimes it takes all I can to maintain that, but it is getting better. One relationship at a time, at least like they say for the first year. I do beleive that's good to do. Your emotions and thoughts take time to straighten out, and they need to heal. Anyway, I'm tired and need some sleep. Thank you Lord for helping to keep my head straight. I pray that you help me to be patient, and give myself some time to heal. Thank you so much. Amen