Today I had a good day at work, but I had some things playing around with my thoughts. I found myself building resentments about all the petty games that were played at work. I try to just get over it, but I'm still angry about it. I feel that I deserve an apology, but I'm sure that won't happen. I sure as hell won't ask for it. maybe this is pride playing with me. I know that I need to forgive them, and I will try to do that. It is a difficult thing to forgive people that you know intentionally did wrong towards you. I find that it makes me feel like a doormat. i would rather get in their face and just tell them what I really think of them, but I can't do that. I'm in recovery now, and that means doing things differantly. I wish there was a way to just click a switch and stop myself from remembering, but there isn't. Afterall, that is what makes it a resentment. We keep remembering the wrong. Now God tells me that I need to pray to forgive, so that's what I am going to do. He also tells me that I need to keep praying about it, until I truly have forgiven. Doesn't really make sense to my mind and my thinking, but I'll do it. I hope this works anyway. Harbouring feelings of anger or resentments are really awful feelings that I don't like to have. I know as an addict that these are dangerous to us if we let them grow. I know this all to well. I used to be an expert at creating resentments from anything. Perhaps this situation is an opportunity for me to practice forgiveness. I thank you Lord for bringing this situation to me to help me to grow in your ways. May your will be done, and not my own. Thank you Lord.