Just before I left work today at shift change one of my co-workers asked how I was doing. Somehow I could tell that this wasn't just a standard "hey, how you doing" type of thing, I could tell he really meant it. He genuinely cared how I was doing. I am fortunate to have some good, caring co-workers but somehow today I was taken off guard by the sincerity of my co-worker. I wanted to tell him I was doing terrible, that I'm stuck in a depression and it sucks but that would be the truth and after years of telling people I'm fine even when I'm not I just told him I was ok, could be better, could be worse. Thats as close as I can come to fully opening up and being more honest with my co-workers. Part of me felt bad for not being honest, like somehow I wasn't appreciating his question. Sounds like that may be the depression talking again.
Replies
I think it is the depression talking :( It is nice to just know someone cares. You done nothing wrong by saying you are okay. (((((hugs)))))
I have had the same experience before. There is nothing to feel guilty ab.... we can only share so much and be ok. Opening up takes so much time.
I\'ve experienced that too before also. That\'s usually my standard answer when I\'m feeling like that, or my answer is \"I\'m doing ok, how are you?\" so it\'s not fully lying and then changing back to them. Nothing to feel bad or guilty about.
I don\'t like sharing my illnesses with people. I think they would be 1. Bored 2. Shocked 3.Repulsed by my BP.
So, it\'s ok to keep it short...and vague!
I understand exactly what you mean. I think sometimes we have to take a risk opening up to others....if its a coworker you\'ve known for a long time you never know...they might be of great comfort. I just recently disclosed my diagnosis to an old coworker as she was leaving for new opportunities and it ended up bringing me relief: relief that she didn\'t think any less of me and in fact thought MORE of me and recognized strength.
((((hugs))))
I wouldn\'t share my diagnosis or how bad I felt with a co-worker because you never know how they will take it or who they might tell. Maybe you could say something mild like I\'m not having a good day, thanks for asking, lets hope tomorrow will be better, how are you going? Its so nice of them to genuinely ask.