I'm sad. I should be happy but I'm sad. I hate this fucking illness. Sometimes I just wish I didn't know about bipolar. Sometimes I wish I just thought I was different. Who knew that "different" meant a lifelong illness that totally fucks with your world and affects everything you do in this life. I hate this illness!!!

Replies

Desigol1979
Desigol1979

Yeah, that\'s what sucks about this disease. However, you are NOT alone and there will ALWAYS be someone who can help you see the positive.
rubyblue
rubyblue

yeah it\'s not a walk in the park that\'s for sure..... sorry you are feeling so shitty Pagan..... do you think some of this is related to seeing your brother tomorrow? idk... just a thought...... I hope you are feeling a tad better tomorrow and have a good time with him and his family

one foot in front of the other my friend..... unfortunately that is all we can do at times

((((hugs)))) xx
sadiegirl13
sadiegirl13

I\'m right there with you!! Except, sometimes I am grateful to know what\'s going on with me.....just not all the time. You know what I do miss though? A time before meds!!!
spacekat
spacekat

Me too. I can barely remember being a teen WITHOUT problems.
I\'m sorry you\'re feeling so sad, Pagan! I\'m glad you came here to share.
You are among people who truly understand - I understand. I wish I could just wash it all away. Sending you big hugs.
spacepony
spacepony

Yeah, I agree this illness sucks big time. I\'m with sadie about knowing wtf is different about me. Takes the pressure off. You\'re not alone although this illness sometimes gives a sense of isolation.....which also sucks. However, we are not this illness. We\'re so much more. xx