o oooo here it is friday i am still strong i know i am please god but i think i am not as good as i was -i feel the tears  darn it ,my husband said lay down ,rest he said i was  doing to much again ,i didnt sleep long enogh this morn .i knew i needed more ,i may  have to occasionally  use  those  sleeping pills i stopped them when i  got out of of the hosp .i just feel have  been over emotionally again today -not a good sign ---uggg ,his old palmarain the dogs almost  blind and cant hear hes old old as the hills -he came in from outside and wet in the dining room .i cried over that  ,yesterday he did the same thing in the bathroom and i had to mop and i was just tired but i shouldnt feel this deep tears i can tell .i have been working since 8 this morning and its now almost 6 thirty but my sons birthday is tomorror and the childrens halloween  party is tomorror and it has took 3 months -i will not be able to do this again not inless this e is totally  in remission .i am feeling odd now so i best get  off here