o no here i go wish you had a tear face yellow friend ,i am so sad ,so alone ,so tired ,so very tired why did god have to make my part of it like a joke ?never show a emotion when you are growing up ,now when this e happens the tears flow,i hate it so bad ,i cry so hard i dont understand -what did catlady say i think it was her i am not thinkig too good ,emotional meltdown was that it ,o what is going on and why ,i cant keep on facing this life it hurts so bad i know i am so close to getting this e under control then work screws me up ,this register bit has me so unbalanced still and tho i have decided to take each day as it comes so far on it ,now what happens but the boss is throwing in different hours since e i have stayed on 2-11 as i saw it was making me sick feeling ,this new boss is working me a a 2-11 and a 10-7 and so forth and i cant sleep at night without a sleeping pill and i am so falling apart ,these tears are what i had trouble with before when i coulnd sleep at all and was having problems a lot ,not just the large szs but constantly the odd feelings ,not me feelings and o the sadness is way deep and i cant stop it its the core of being ,and i get angry at me cause i am not a crybaby and this is no way to live and i yelled at my son today -told him to get a full time job that i was tired of taking care of him -o god i was so ugly and how do i say i am sorry when he could be doing more to take care of his bills -yet i did it in a wrong way ,i have to stop and get this under control somehow and go to work i work a 4 -11 today and a 10-7 tommor ,wish i knew what to do cause i feel i dont know what i feel ,