Just discovered I have not been doing this Journal thing correctly so copied my own mistakenly made "Comments" from the past couple of days here.11-16-07 Pain in hands, wrists and ankles almost unbearable at work today. I thought I had a clear mind today but have made several mistakes that I should not have made. I dream of never working again.11-17-07 After reading the profiles of several other people. I am not sure what to say. In many ways it makes me ashamed to complain of my own problems. I wish there was a cure for everyone.11-20-07 Back to work, only place I have internet access. I guess I should not complain about work I do get a lot of down time here. I remember working much harder in the tobacco fields back home (literally). RA pain has been at about its normal level lately.. My wife was in a better mood this past couple of days, sure makes life easier. Don't have the courage to tell here about the increasing strange feelings I have been experiencing. Yesterday I found myself in another dazed walk through a wall mart store with her. I am not sure how to explain it but it is frightening when I finally snap out of it. Its like I don't know where I am or how I got there for a few seconds. God help me it scares the h*** out of me.11-21-07 Back at work. Feeling good right now, physically and mentally. Weather cooled off considerably last night, yet RA is not bad. My mind seems very clear today almost reminds me of who I once was. I don't want to get over excited could just be the crest of another peak in the roller coaster ride But will try to enjoy it while it last.11-22-07 Back to work. I wish all a Happy thanksgiving. Todays RA not too bad but feel broken mentally. Why? Guess i could give a few reasons but the honest answer is that I don't know why?
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If I\'m not in a hurry, I like to get lost. I find I look at things I have never seen before. Try going to a really big shopping mall, and get lost. My wife and I went to go camping one time. We tried a short cut. We found ourselves at a beautiful spot where there was no people, just nature.
Actually, I look forward to dementia. I will have an excuse to grab pretty nurses where I want to. They can always say, \"He\'s a nice guy, it\'s just his dementia\"!
How long have you had RA? What drugs are you on? Possibly the drugs are giving you side effects of light headedness and fogging your mind? We all have our issues here on DS and yours to you is most significant so don\'t downplay what you are going thru. I hope you feel better soon.
Bizemomm is right, maybe you should tell your Dr. about the confusion/mental issues. Could be your meds. If you take MTX and is doesn\'t work I would ask the dr. about getting off, it doesn\'t have nice side effects. Sounds like you are stressing out quite a bit, do you have long honest talks with your wife? Maybe that will help.