When my car didn't pass inspection I handled it well. I called a shop and got a quote for brakes. I supposedly just needed the pads. In the morning I went to the shop and was told it would be a good idea to replace the rotors too. I said ok. I should have said no but I was afraid that they were right and the rotors were rusty and would damage the pads. probably BS but I figured ok...this year the whole thing then next time just pads.
All in all I was ok. I didn't get all worked up and snarky. My car has been inspected and I have new brakes, new windshield wipers, new air filter and an oil change. I always feel as if I  have been taken advantage of at repair shops and I probably have.
For the last 2 days I have had to be out the door at 7:30 for car inspections/repair. I decided to take a nap. It began then. I dozed off and was woken by a "feeling" that turned into a deep sadness and hurt. It has been a few weeks since that has happened. Waking up to a feeling that I think is part loneliness, hopelessness and shame. I'm taking a wild guess here. I'm really not sure what the feeling)s) is/are just that they are bad.
I feel like I haven't done anything that I should have as far as packing goes. I have eaten all the wrong things when I had been doing well and starting to feel better. Maybe it's the holidays. Maybe they effect me more than I admit.
I have been demotivated for so long now. Maybe depressed. I don't know. I sit in my corner, mentally and physically, and don't move. Dreams have been intense but I don't remember them.
I had an emotional flashback while shopping today. I was picking up a box of facial wipes and the box looks like baby wipes which brought me back to panties with pink and blue roses and washing myself.
Maybe yoga...some gentle yoga and meditation of some kind. Maybe that will give my brain a break from the bad stuff and help me feel more balanced