well the waves have finally stopped tossing me around today i feel like a deflated boat after all the tormual of being thrown around in a hot temper spree omg i have never been so mad for so many days in a row no control no stopping it was so out of control omg my nurse if she doesnt know how crazy i really amĀ  before this last wekek she sure does now ah ha im a bit edgy that i may suddenly lose control again feeling anxious about whats around the next corner ugh