I did it....!!!

Well, I saw my pd today, my second visit to her.  I really miss my old pd and right now I don't know if I can ever get over him or used to my new one?  I fought with myself about even going to this appt.  I had cold feet so bad, I just don't know my pd and I feel very insecure and vulnerable at this time of my life. My friend wrote me a letter to take to her in case I forgot anything, my pd appreciated the letter and the daily mood graphs I've been keeping, they tell her alot.  Up until 5 mins before my appt. I wasn't sure if I could get out of the car, I just dreaded the thought of seeing a specialist who doesn't know me and whom I don't trust...aaaahhh!  Well, I did go and am happy with the results.  I am on a combo of Lithium, Lamictal, Seroquel and Trazadone,  as of today I stopped taking the anti-depressent Trazadone and she raised my doseage of Lamictal another 50mg.  I also take Seroquel at supper time instead of at bedtime, hoping I will be tired enough at bedtime to actually go to sleep, Ha wouldn't that be nice!  So she seems like a good doctor I guess, I just need to trust her more and that may be hard for me. As some of you know it takes me a long time to trust someone, and without trust it's hard to keep a relationship going.  I am very glad I went today.