So the knots in the stomach and the butterflies in the throat are starting to choke me to death! I start school in 12 days and I feel like this count down to the end has begun. I'm looking at these wonderful moments with my son when we are playing or whatever and thinking I wonder how much time I'll have to do this. I worry that my illness, plus my job, plus my schooling, plus my family will make me explode. I don't know if I can manage all of this! I know God can and I need to remember that but it is so hard. So hard to remember that this is his deal and I'm just along for the ride. It is all so in my face you know. I'm not sure that the medication is working. I'm very glad to be out of the Seroquel stupor and I know that many of you have mentioned Melatonin but I haven't had a chance to get out to the store so I am still struggling to sleep which is really frustrating. I don't feel tired during the day or the night for that matter but it is Hell to wake up in the morning and get my day started. I know I should just suck it up and get up. There is so much to do and laying in bed praying that it isn't really 6:30 is such a baby thing to do. So I'm feeling bottom line is I'm feeling again and I'm kind of worried it is too much. So pray for me.
Replies
You\'re in my thoughts.
I will keep you in my prayers. We are here for you.
It\'s a lot on your plate tizzy. Just take it slow. It will all fall into place. You\'re probably just apprehensive.I\'ll continue to pray for you. :-).
I finished my master\'s degree after being dx\'d but, you\'re right, its not easy. You also do miss a lot of time with family but, on the other hand, they will benefit from it. Good luck! I\'m rootin\' for ya.
Tizzy!! I would love to finish my degree, but for me, raising a child is a full time job that takes so much out of me. When she starts school, I will consider it once again. I have always admired people for going to school and working a joband then raising a child on top of that! I do wonder how much is sacrificed. Temporary sacrifice for the better can be worth it. I just dont want to see you set yourself up by setting goals too high (which I tend to do!!). Can you take a lighter load or not work as many hours?
For me, when I feel that dread and despair about waking up in the morningit means my meds are off.OR its that time of the month! LOL! Of course, not all our problems are BP related! Is that good or bad? Hehehe... :)
Love and hugs for my friend Tizzy!
XOXOXOXOM.