It is getting hard to log on and write everyday. I thought I should do it now to record what I am feeling. I am feeling anxious right now. I haven't been into work in over two weeks and tonight is my fist night back, and its a late shift. I think I may need to take a xanax before I get to the theatre, jus to take the edge off. I am feeling somethings other than anxiety. I feel depressed and alone as well as confused in a general sense.
 
I honestly want to quit this job, but I dont know what I would do in place of it. It took me so long to just get this minimum wage paying job. This job that will work with my scheduling demands. I am sure there are other places for me to work, especially at the university, but it is just getting really difficult. I am simply not happy with this job and it is giving me headaches and other horrible things. I simply want to be done with it. Let it never phase me again. I want to have a job that I really look forward to going to.
 
I am getting really distracted. I can't really write right now and soon I will be getting ready for work so I better get going... I will try to remember to write later tonight.
 
Goodnight moon