Things are beginning to get better as time goes on. I went to the interview at Loveland ski area and I couldn't do it it was a group interview and I didn't really realize how far the job really is from Denver and how bad it could get in the winter since it was already snowing when I got up there, I know that I-70 can get nasty up in the mountains. I don't want to push it or challenge the roads with my small car. Though I am still kinda anxious for no real reason. I know I could really use my tutor this week but I am debating if I should or should not cancel the appointment. I think that I may need a week off before we begin to jump into studying for the second exam. I do horrible on the home works and I failed the first exam thus putting me in a bad place with this class. Even when it is my only class I should be putting all of my energy into it and nothing else. Next semester I need to start taking 5 classes per semester to graduate in three years. I know that I need to get this done because it's been so long and I still have so much to complete. My mom told me today that I should be a real estate agent, before that she suggested that I become someone's personal assistant. Watching some war movie with my dad and step mom right now. I am waiting for next weekend when I get to go to Durango and see my brother and have a nice vacation and break from reality. Plus it will be a 7 hour drive with me and my dad so maybe we'll have a good conversation. Then when we get to Durango it will just be the three of us once again. No presence from the step parts of the family. I think this will be the first vacation that they are not attending. I remember when it was just me and dad because Lucas never wanted to come along. We went to Mexico three or four times just the two of us, that's why I think that I am a lot like dad. We bond a lot. But, I bond with mom a lot too. I think that it might be because I am good with my family. I don't know how great I am with my friends, since I think that I really lost Rachael. It's OK though because we don't see each other every day as we would in HS. I know that she is engaged and that she doesn't want me to know. But, a mutual friend of ours Katie told me the news... I was not surprised. My mom thinks that she is doing this to me because I am too close and I can see her failures and the shit that she is getting into. Just because you are still with the same person for a while does not mean that you simply move to the next step. Rachael has not even completed a course in college. She has yet to experience the good or the bad in life. She still needs to get out there and discover herself.