3 DAY WEEKEND!!!

Thursday night, 10-2-08:  A 3 day weekend!  Yea!  I need one.  We thought about going camping but the whole business/building thing is up in the air.  I am sad on one hand....on the other, I am looking forward to being home an extra day.  We have been so busy.  I still have last weekend's laundry to fold!  I will have to put it back in the dryer to de-wrinkle! Today was tough, at work.  The male para I work with & I had a mild confrontation.  He approached me with some something about files.  Anyway, I still am not sure what happened.  I do know I said, "I don't care."  Meaning, I didn't care what we did with the files.  He is very thin-skinned and, I guess, thought I didn't care what he thought.  Anyway, I tried to explain to him that when I am frustrated I just have to compare whatever it is to losing Scott.  Then, I really don't care about the small frustrations in life.  I asked him why he assumed everything was about him.  Then he said something like, "Well, I guess when you are having a Scott day...."  I informed him everyday was a Scott day....just some are easier than others.  Anyway, it was upsetting just because I have all the nonsense I can handle.   And, one of our students had a pretty rough day.  He is more behavioral than autistic.  Anyway, he started the day out on the wrong foot and by 2nd hour was really in trouble.  Finally, by late afternoon, I had enough and took him to the office. I had done all I knew how to do.  It was just time to call the parents.   When he was between poor behaviors, he was pleasant to be around and worked hard.  But when he was having his moments, he was full throttle!  It is hard to deal with that and try to keep the other kids focused and calm.  We had a sub today, and although she is awesome, it messes up our routine.  I think that was part of his problem.  Adam lost his job.  Again.  I swear that "boy" has more trouble with jobs!  That is part of his LD stuff...social skills.  Although, this time, I think the work just wasn't there.  He will have to get another one PRONTO!  He has car insurance to pay for. Chris came over last night.  It is always good to see him.  He ate chili with us and visited for quite some time. The weather is changing quickly!  Tonight will be about 40!  I do not like cold weather!  On Sunday, however, it will be back in the mid-eighties.  Crazy! I am missing Scott so much I can hardly stand it!  I am so tired of this empty, sick feeling in my stomach.  No, I don't cry as often but it seems the ache is just as intense as it ever was.  The more time passes, the more I miss him.  I hate this!!! On an up note, I did post a couple of photos of me-awful photo, and two of my best friends. They were taken when we went on the house boat with one of Scott's friends.  They are so supportive of me.  I appreciate them so much! 

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

I hope that you can relax and enjoy your weekend...you need and deserve that...so work to make it relaxing...lol! Love to you...Karen
deleted_user
deleted_user

Sorry about the confrontation you had with your co-worker; but just realize that other people \"don\'t\" get it. No one can, except for us - the ones that have lost our children. Some people just don\'t have enough inner compassion to step back; and let things be. Makes me sad to read about some of the kids you work with; life is tough enough; and these kids will have it harder. I\'ll pray for Adam to find another job quickly - the economy is suffering right now - and I feel so blessed to have finally found a job.
Take good care honey - the ache is still inside of me over Shaun, every day - and yes I hate it too!
Love you ((((((Big Hug))))))
deleted_user
deleted_user

Well with that extra day off maybe you can get some relax time. As Demi said some people just don\'t understand what we are going thru & I hope they never do...Love & hugs, Connie
deleted_user
deleted_user

I have to do that with the clothes all the time. Try to relax and enjoy your extra day at home. Love and Hugs.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Hallo,
\" Scott day\" I think that is so inconsiderate for that man to say that. Is hitting him an option :-). Hugs, Inga
deleted_user
deleted_user

Just seems there is to much gong on and its hard to deal with it. I know where your coming from. I hope you have a relaxing weeking. Love Joanne
deleted_user
deleted_user

Enjoy the extra day off. They are very needed. Your co-worker will never \"get it\" so hopefully his skin will thicken. It is funny how we compare things to our loss. You\'re so right, nothing much compares after going through what we have. I\'m sorry the pain is still so intense. Mine has seemed to ease. More of a numb. Oh well. We love, we miss, we hurt. Hoping you have the rest of a good weekend and a better week with your students. Love Robin
deleted_user
deleted_user

Hope you had a decent weekend. I agree with everyone about the co-worker. No-one but another Mom in the situation truly \"gets it\" The rest of your life will be filled with \"Scott days\" They are never gone from us, oh, some days are a little easier than others, but the bottom line is that our boys are not coming back!
I hope you are feeling some better, Hon, and you have a much more peaceful week ahead. Love, judy
deleted_user
deleted_user

I hope the long weekend has made you feel more relaxed and able to continue on this uphill road. Sending you support and prayers. Love and hugs Cathy