3/14/2013
Feeling ok...I guess. Just don't understand men at all. I don't have trouble accepting if a man doesn't want to date me or whatever. I can even somewhat understand if he doesn't want to come out and say so. I can maybe, with difficulty, understand if he doesn't want to even be friends and chat online or something. What I cannot understand is the silence. One week you are talking for hours online every night and the next week complete silence. And these are nice guys, not players. Oh well, that's that.
Never been the type who has to have a man in order to feel complete. Quite capable of taking care of myself. Time to focus on myself. Been dragging my feet on doing a couple important things I have to do. tomorrow go to Social Security and get my name back. Also call and set up appointment with audiologist to start process of getting new hearing aids. Monday, start going to the gym during lunch to lose the weight I gained during the holidays and when dealing with dad's death. Lose some more weight. Summer is right around the corner and I'm going to want to go to swimming pool. This ain't my first rodeo and I know the things I need to do to put this all behind me. Time to get back my joie de vivre. Go to the movies. Go bowling. Go visit the people at the nursing home where dad was. A whole world out there for me to play in.
I know one reason I've been pushing myself is I can't stand the thought that she will be here in a couple of months living in my house, with my husband, living my life. I guess I thought it would be easier if I had someone too. But that's how it goes. Time to put on my big girl granny apnties and deal with it instead of trying to avoid it.I'll get through it; I have before. The worst thing in life is not death. The worst thing is not living. Forward march.
Never been the type who has to have a man in order to feel complete. Quite capable of taking care of myself. Time to focus on myself. Been dragging my feet on doing a couple important things I have to do. tomorrow go to Social Security and get my name back. Also call and set up appointment with audiologist to start process of getting new hearing aids. Monday, start going to the gym during lunch to lose the weight I gained during the holidays and when dealing with dad's death. Lose some more weight. Summer is right around the corner and I'm going to want to go to swimming pool. This ain't my first rodeo and I know the things I need to do to put this all behind me. Time to get back my joie de vivre. Go to the movies. Go bowling. Go visit the people at the nursing home where dad was. A whole world out there for me to play in.
I know one reason I've been pushing myself is I can't stand the thought that she will be here in a couple of months living in my house, with my husband, living my life. I guess I thought it would be easier if I had someone too. But that's how it goes. Time to put on my big girl granny apnties and deal with it instead of trying to avoid it.I'll get through it; I have before. The worst thing in life is not death. The worst thing is not living. Forward march.
Replies
Sounds like you are ready to go. I know what it\'s like to accept it mentally but the emotional lag time seems to get me every time. I wish you the best :) As far as the silent men, I don\'t know. It\'s possible that they got busy. I know when I am home, I rarely get on the computer. Too much to take care of and too many places I need to be. I feel for you though because it sucks when you are at least expecting some kind of response and there is nothing. I think you are good with your self esteem though. Keep on keepin on and I am sure things will be better for you.
Thanks, Blue. I think it tends to be two steps forward, one step back. I chave trouble saying the D word . My ex came to help me with some things when my dad died a couple months ago. I went to introduce him and I couldn\'t get the words \"my ex-husband\" out of my mouth. He had to introduce himself. When I went to the courthouse a few weeks ago to get certified copies of my divorce (that d word again) for some things, when the lady pulled it up on her computer sha asked me \"married to Rick\"? I said yes, the burst in to tears and had to leave. A week later I was able to do it. I will get there eventually. Hope you have a good weekend.
Divorce is so hard but you seem to be doing evrything right to get back into a life for yourself. Yes, moving forward is always the way to start your life over again.