Checking in...
WOW, I can't believe I haven't journaled since May, but then again, I do journal every day in my Jesus Calling book by Sarah Young. I am also on Facebook, A lot, maybe to much? But then again is it ever to much, when you get support from my FMO group, GRASP and Walking for wellness groups? No I don't think so.
I made it through my 1.5 year mark, again the days leading up to 'that day', were worse than the actual day. But I now have a since of Peace as after 18 months, my sweet sons ashes are home with me here in MO where they should be. Of course his Dad, Step Mom and I agreed they could have half and do what they wanted. Which was to spread Gregor's ashes at the beach in Galveston, where that boy loved to play. We started taking him there when he was just a couple of months old. Not sure what I'm going to do, but for now, having his ashes on my night stand is comforting. Of course I haven't told the family he's home, remember 'it creeps them out', but to BAD, just not ready to fight that battle.
I set a goal for myself too and that is to check in here more frequently, I realize not everyone even has Facebook. Sending HUGS to all my SOTH. Started SAVING for next years retreat, I'm so ready for those HUGS. :)
Keeping my status as GOOD and that is OK, don't think after losing a child I will ever be at excellent?
Forever Gregor's Mum,
Julie
I made it through my 1.5 year mark, again the days leading up to 'that day', were worse than the actual day. But I now have a since of Peace as after 18 months, my sweet sons ashes are home with me here in MO where they should be. Of course his Dad, Step Mom and I agreed they could have half and do what they wanted. Which was to spread Gregor's ashes at the beach in Galveston, where that boy loved to play. We started taking him there when he was just a couple of months old. Not sure what I'm going to do, but for now, having his ashes on my night stand is comforting. Of course I haven't told the family he's home, remember 'it creeps them out', but to BAD, just not ready to fight that battle.
I set a goal for myself too and that is to check in here more frequently, I realize not everyone even has Facebook. Sending HUGS to all my SOTH. Started SAVING for next years retreat, I'm so ready for those HUGS. :)
Keeping my status as GOOD and that is OK, don't think after losing a child I will ever be at excellent?
Forever Gregor's Mum,
Julie
Replies
I get to enjoy you on Facebook and for that, I am very grateful! Love, Lauri
Hi Julie! I am glad that you are at peace. Yes, the days leading up to an event are usually much worse than the event itself. Today is Michael\'s b/d and it is really okay for me! I have Michael\'s ashes with me at home and I will never do anything with them until I am ready to do so. HAHA on not telling your family that you have them. I know some people find it \"creepy\" but I take comfort with Michael\'s ashes being right here with me. What I do to be able to go on retreat is open up a separate savings and call it my \"retreat fund\". I stick little bits in here and there and it really adds up over the year! It is the only way I can afford to go. I hope you come to Florida next year.
Peace.
Grateful to hear how you are feeling and yes, saving is what we must do to make these retreats happen. :)
I agree about the days leading up can often be more tender than the actual as tomorrow is my son\'s birthday and I find myself today allowing myself to feel the feelings and remembering how I felt the night before I felt as if I would \"pop.\" :)
Glad you have your son\'s ashes and know what a comfort that can be.
For Gregor and for you, heartfelt (((hugs))) and appreciate your journal and most of all YOU!
XO Joanie
I have my daughters ashes in a beautiful jewerly box style with little flowers paisley all around it. i go in every more and wish her a happy day I have a cross that was around her neck in hospital (till they took it off) and i put it to my cheek so she can feel the warmth of me. and her husbands ashes and all our dogs and cats urn. my sweet daughter. and i,am so happy you got your sons with you. it is conforting to me. bless your angel hugs and love mary ann