i havent been here in a long time. My life has become so unmanageable that i cant take it anymore. Im at rock bottom now. Ive lost my car, my stuff is all i  pawn. My electric is going to be shut off tootomorrow and my life SUCKS!! This stressful life Ive created is 100% self induced. I hate my life. I hate myself right now for being so damn stupid!!