I recently had a falling-out with a girl. I lent her a book of mine, and then we had the falling out. She was hurt by it. So was I.
Afterwards, I debated whether to ask her for the book. In a way, I didn't want it back. But then again, it was mine, and I might want to loan it to someone else.
When I gave it to her, it was just the two of us. There were no witnesses; there was no proof. So, I figured that I had no leverage to make her give it back to me. All I could do was ask.
So, I wrote her an e-mail saying: Would she mail my book back? Or if she threw it out, send me a new one from Amazon, etc.? That if she was willing to do that, I'd promise not to e-mail her again (just as she wanted).
Now, I knew from her character, sadly, that she was fragile, bitter, and sharp. But I thought, maybe, she would do this as a gesture of humanity.
Her response (and I'm paraphrasing): Wow, you would agree to stop harassing me by e-mail if you got your book back? You're such a great guy.
And that was it.
I'm not just disappointed by her reaction-- the level of which I will not rise to. (I'm too grounded for that.) I'm also annoyed that even if I wanted to file a small-claims suit, I don't have proof. It would be my word against hers.
I feel powerless. E-mailing her again, or texting her, or even stopping by her workplace to get her to give it to me simply would not work (I think). Moreover, it would create more stress for me.
I WISH I could make a case in small-claims court. If I could, I would file it without even talking to her again. BUT it seems I have no leverage there. I can't make a case, right? So... I lose.
One of the things that bothers me the most is that if I had someone else's property, and we had a falling out, I wouldn't steal their stuff. I believe I would give it back. Why? Because morally, it's the right thing to do. It belongs to them. It doesn't belong to me.
It's just so sad to witness a selfish, rather than selfless, character.