Right, so, I'm on this site because of abstinance. I'm just going to say this: I really have a need for sexual exploration now. I really want that.I'm soooo... rrhhgghhg... frustrated! It's so difficult to keep things bottled up. It's emotionally "right"; but it's.... so painful, too, now.I want to explore.I want expression. I don't want to hold things back at this time!! [And I feel like I keep hearing more and more girls think that I'm cute! (Or did in the past.) Oh, my gosh; was my perspective of myself so... skewed?] If I fall, how much longer until I do?If I do, how hard will it hit me?...