You don’t know what it’s like, attractive girl. To not date casually. To have never had a girlfriend.You have no idea.You, with your looks and your body and your hair. You, for whom picking up a guy and then being physical with him the first night is par for the course. You, for whom sex (maybe) isn’t a taboo. Who have maybe even had multiple partners.You don’t know what it’s like not to stand out to members of the opposite sex.To want physical contact so badly it makes you want to cry.When you walk down the street, guys stare at you. You get attention. You’re desired.You don’t know what it feels like to feel like you have to compete for a girl’s attention, because you’re not “flashy” enough. To have so much of value on the inside that won’t catch someone’s attention at the first look.You’ve had a number of ex-boyfriends. You’ve actually had someone whom you’ve referred to as a “boyfriend”; you know what it’s like to hear someone call you his “girlfriend” to other people. You’ve had experiences being in a relationship where you know you’re going to see the person day after day.No, you don’t know what it’s like never to have had that.You’ve had sex. It isn’t off-limits for you. Just as it isn’t for so many other people.You fit in with all those people on that.When the topic of conversation in a group turns to sex… you can relate. Because you’ve experienced it.You don’t know what it’s like to be 30 years old and still waiting for your first time.With your life partner.Whom you haven’t found. And don’t know when you will.Or if.At least you’re attractive. Desirable. Maybe you haven’t found the right person for you… but don’t you like the attention you get?If there were a guy who interested you, well, your looks could attract him.And you get favors from guys. From strangers.Tell me: Do you appreciate that you get those favors when so many others don’t?Do you appreciate it?You look like you have so much fun when you’re with him— your boyfriend. You laugh. Hold hands.And maybe do other stuff behind closed doors.You have no idea what it’s like to have mostly gone without these things in life.What an alien concept that would be for you.Yeah, your jaw would hit the floor if you met a “normal” heterosexual guy who’s 30 and is still waiting to have sex. You might write him off as “religious.” As “one of those”…But what if he told you he was waiting not for religious reasons, but for emotional ones?Would your brain comprehend what you’ve just heard?A decent-looking guy with good social skills who lives secularly and doesn’t want to have sex with a girl before marriage. “What’s wrong with him?” you’d think.Or: How quaint. Or “how cute.”Maybe you’d make fun of him (to make yourself feel better), no?No, you’re not able to empathize with the less-attractive people, less-desirable people, guys OR girls. No, I don’t think you have that sensitivity.You don’t know what it’s like to feel more comfortable standing on the sidelines, observing. Perhaps assessing a social situation, deciding whether you’re comfortable getting involved in it. Or else just… observing.You’re so used to the concept of a “boyfriend.” To the word. You don’t appreciate that you’ve had them ever since high school or whenever.You don’t know what it’s like to DISLIKE going to bars. To hate the crowds and noise and people checking each other out and judging them on their looks, and in any case, you don’t drink, because you don’t like the taste of alcohol and want to remain connected to your feelings and to other people and to really be yourself and appreciate the moments you have— the realness— and NOT intoxication-mudied interactions that do the opposite of fostering deeper connections between people.Because all that isn’t you…No, attractive girl. You just don’t know what it’s like to be in my shoes.