Life sucks as usual. Been puttingof my next surgery. Just can;t deal with it right now.Then the agony of waiting for results. SOmetimes, i guess I don't really want to know if the tunmors are back, bigger, multiplied , spread ? Or whatever it is that they do...  Been working 4 jobs. Quit one. Tring tokeep my mind busy until my huband comes home. Just feeling lonely and sad. Don't know what to do with myseld in a lonley apartment. I miss my daughter so much. Still can;t stand the thought of not being able to see her everyday. I miss hugging her, kissing her in the morning before she wen to school and just being a mom. Life seems so meaningless now.