2006 Easter Weekend

 
I'm not catholic, so I never gave it much thought. The year my son Ryan passed away was the night of good friday. His sister, my daughter Erica found him laying on the floor, next to her bed, she had 2 friends over that night, and he was talking to them as he was laying down, facing the floor, above my bedroom. Good Friday, easter weekend turned into my worst weekend ever. The thing about , Good friday it is on different weekends every year..My son turned into an angel on April 15 2006, 4 years ago Easter Weekend. It hasn't fallen on that weekend sense.....YA!! April 15th Tax day too...Easter use to be my favorite Holiday, with the Pastel Colors, the smell of spring, the new spring outfits, the easter basket wrapped in beautiful colors, the smell of the easter lily's...Awww, they smell so good...After my son past on Easter weekend, I was so angry, and sad, I cried when I smelt easter lily's...The other day I walked into some easter lily's and I just had to smell them, the smell was so cleansing, so sweet, I walked away with a smile on my face... Some how your tears and saddness, turns into love and happiness!! I never believed in a million years, that I would smile on easter again. Its like the paradox in life. Just like the Paradox in the "St. Francis Prayer".. 

"Lord, Make me a channel of thy peace - That where there is hatred - I may bring love - That where there is wrong - I may bring the spirit of fogiveness - That where there is discord, I may bring harmony - That where there is error - I may bring truth - That where there is doubt - I may bring faith - That where there is despair - I may bring hope - That where there is shadow - I may bring light -That where there is sadness - I may bring joy - Lord, grant that I may seek, rather to comfort- than to be comforted - to understand - than to be understood - to love - than to be loved - For it is by self forgetting - that one finds - It is by forgiving - that one is forgiven - it is by dying - that one awakens to eternal life. Amen

Every time I say this Prayer, it Inspires me!!  It is the Truth! The Paradox in life to live by!!! I like to live by this prayer, it gives me Great Love, as well as Happiness.....Love to all my friends here on FMO.. XOXOXO  Kelly

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Kelly, I was rasied Catholic. The St. Francis prayer is one very few I remembered b/c I left the church years ago. Your entry is very inspiring. Wishing you a peaceful Easter. Hugs, Pat
CorysMom
CorysMom

So glad for you that you can now smell the sweetness of the Easter Lily and that Easter can once again be a happy time. It is a health step to wash away the anger. Many smiles for you this weekend.
deleted_user
deleted_user

You should lay some Easter Lily\'s on Ryan\'s grave. I am glad you are having a good period now. They will come much more often I am sure. Have a peaceful weekend. hugs j
KellyLee105
KellyLee105

I had Ryan\'s Ashes Scattered down on the Beach!!!! In Hampton Beach New Hampshire, 10 minutes from where I live......
deleted_user
deleted_user

It\'s a beautiful prayer, one of my favorites - thank you for posting it here so I could read it again - it\'s uplifting - those flowers are so nice; and Easter was always a good holiday for me - I understand and I hope you have a blessed day - and enjoy the spirit of the day.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I am so gald for you that you are finding some peace .And it\'s always good when anyone stands up for the LORD.
MitchellsMom
MitchellsMom

Dear Kelly, my prayers are with you on this Easter weekend , I know it will be very difficult for you. I am so glad that you CAN smell the Lilys again, what a beautiful sign that you are making great progress in your journey. I can remember so clearlly, two and a half years after Mitch was killed looking at the sun shining, and really realizing that it was actually shining, it was as though it was the first time since losing him I could see the beauty in God\'s creation and how beautiful it was! I knew in that moment that I was getting better and it was a good feeling. My love goes out to you, sincerely , Mitchells mom
SusanLarson
SusanLarson

I am so happy for you! Peace is something I think we all aspire too! Hugs, Susan
deleted_user
deleted_user

I love this prayer! Thank you for sharing it with us. And I\'m glad you are coming to terms with situations surrounding Ryan\'s death. That\'s a big step toward healing.
Love to you, Cherie
momjmc
momjmc

Happy Easter to you, Kelly.
Love, prayers, and hugs, Sharon
JFandMDmom
JFandMDmom

Love this prayer...so uplifting...thank you for sharing it. I\'m glad you are finding some peace and turning those tears of sadness to happiness. Love to you, Valerie
deleted_user
deleted_user

I\'m Catholic and I love that prayer. Glad the season has turned around for you. It is about renewal. Love and hugs Cathy
deleted_user
deleted_user

I love the prayer you posted. Easter is about sacrifice, resurrection, forgiveness, and love.... I am glad you can smell the lilies again....I pray you have had peace all around you today and will continue to feel God\'s love every minute of the day. Thank you for sharing your journal. Love and Lilies, dale...brandon\'s mom
PLA58
PLA58

I am glad you can now enjoy the Easter Lilly. It is a pure flower, like our Angles are now. hugs Penny
biowoman
biowoman

Thank you Kelly for sharing this with us...love to you...Karen