1st holiday season w/o Spike

It's been rough, this month.This is my 1st holiday season w/o Spike.  I miss him awfully.  The pain & sadness hasn't so much gone away as been buried.I still have nightmares almost nightly.I'm debating whether I should "see" someone about this.On the plus side, I went a whole 24 hours w/o a smoke this week (granted that was days ago).*shrug*