WHEW!!!

9-26-09:  Wow.....I almost put 2007....seems as I am stuck on that year. Stuck is the right word.  I have much to look forward to and yet I am STUCK!  I just miss Scott so much.  This journey does not, in my world, get easier.  I miss my son more each day!   I did find out that some of Scott's friends put a Facebook page up in his honor.  That is so awesome.  It makes me feel better that  people remember him and love him even after two years.  It just shows what an impact he had.    I have been having a really hard time lately.  I guess it is all the birthdays.  Mine was Sept. 12.  Chris's is today.  Scott's is Oct. 22.  My nephew's was Sept. 20.  Birthdays were/are a big deal at my home!  In fact, we (Chris' girlfriend and I) are having a surprise party for him here tomorrow. (Sun.)  I am excited about that.  Imagne...excitement....I never thought I would feel that agian.  I guess I have come a LONG way!  Anyway, Chris is THIRTY!  Oh my gosh.....I do not feel old enough to have a son that age!  On the other hand...I feel old enough to have a sixty year old.   Work is finally starting to calm down.  I have been making a real effort to get along with the new department head.  I am reminding myself that everyone has their "stuff".  Compared to mine, it is usually not much.  However, it is their stuff and it is big to them.  Compassion....Understanding....Acceptance....I really try to get it.I, after being off my meds, for about a month, am back on.  I am just going to have to find a way to finace this!!!!!