WOW!
July 9, 2009: Wow! I just read some journals and comments and was sad to see some serious, judgemental, unsupportive comments! I think we all need to remember why we are here....not only because our children died....but to support each other during the most difficult journey any of us will ever make! And, as much as many of us have in common, others of us have nothing in common. I for one, have made some wonderful friends here. Hopefully, I have made no enemies. I do know there are people I started chatting with and then found out we just don't share the same philosophies, life styles, or points of view. I still, although I am only occaisionally in contact with them, wish them no ill will. I certainly don't won't to have any part of making any of us feel worse than we already do. So, I have expressed thoughts about something that, at this moment, has nothing to do with me. But to think that it ever could, just makes me sad! On to lighter things! I am still struggling with sleep. However, I was up until 4 a.m. and then only slept about six hours. So, tonight, I am tired. Maybe with the help of a sleep aid I can make it to bed fairly early and get my body clock turned back around! I have been doing NOTHING all summer. Now it all seems to be piling up. (another reason to get my sleep back on track) Craig will be on vacation, for two weeks, beginning July 18. A couple of those days will be spent at the lake with friends. I don't know what the rest will bring. I hope to go somewhere with the camper. Adam is getting his DNA test done on July 15. We won't know anything until the end of August or beginning of September. I am ready to get on with this! August 4 brings another court date for Adam. August 5 and 6 a very close friend of mine, from Olathe, KS is coming to stay a couple of days. She has been through everything in my life, with me, since 1993. On August 7 or 8, we will head for Lesterville, MO. Johnson's Shut-Ins is there. One of Scott's friends is getting several of our families together for a huge campout. My "biddy buddies" are included in the group! We will be there at least three days. The campground is right by the Black River. It is so pretty! It will be hard to go, on one hand, though. The only other time I was there was when Scott was about ten. I am glad we are going to be at a different campground. August 17, 18, and 20, I have meetings at school. My official first day back at work will be the 24th. The kids start on the 25th. My summer will be over before I know it! I want more!!!! For now, I am just trying to stay in the moment. At least I have been getting in the pool this week!
Replies
That\'s too bad that there have been unsupportive or judgmental comments. I certainly hope I am not guilty. I know I always try to be open minded because if you haven\'t walked in another persons shoes then you have to remain objective. Sounds like the rest of your summer is filled with activities, so rest up friend. Hoping all works out with the DNA for both parties. Love to you. Robin
It is all about supporting each other during the most difficult time of our lives! We grieve in our own way. Each of us have different circumstances. I do speak the truth as I see it when and if appropriate. We can all beg to differ on opinions :-).
Sleep continues to be a problem with me. It always was even before my son died. I sip on whiskey these days to get to sleep. It works.
I have been to Johnson\'s Shut-In\'s! I have pics of me and an old guy friend at Elephant state park! This was just a few years back. Beautiful country! If you stop at Trump Lake Resort on highway 21, please be sure to tell Juanita and Parrish hello for me! The Roadhouse Tavern is on the property.
I hope all works out with a manageable determination with Adam\'s DNA testing.
Peace and Love to you,
Belinda
hmmm, this makes me sad to hear, as i personally have not come across this at all. i have only had caring, supportive contact with others. would privately let me know if you have seen that i have said anything you consider out of line, as i have tried to be supportive of everyone, but i guess sometimes our grief may get in the way of our emotions. please let me know if you consider some of my comments offensive. i would appreciate any constructive criticism, as i do strive to be supportive. thank you for your input and i wish you sleep. God bless
I too am sorry to hear that there have been negative comments made...it also sounds like all of us hope it wasn\'t us that said something that could hurt another (me included). I guess our natural \"mom\" tendancies is to feel guilty for something we may have done...even if we haven\'t done it. You know, reading what you have scheduled for the remainder of the summer sounds like you are going to get to enjoy a lot of things! Maybe you didn\'t get to be as productive as you would have liked, but recouping is very important. Like you said, you will be back to work before you know it...so allowing yourself to get better is best ! Take care...love and hugs...Karen
I haven\'t been on enough to read any of the negative comments, thankfully and would feel the same way you do. It\'s hard to believe anyone would be mean to another grieving person. I have to apologize to you, dear. I know you have been going through so much right now and I have not been here for you. I feel like I am letting all my DS friends down. I hurts knowing that I\'m not staying strong and supporting you and others right now, but always know, PLEASE, that you are in my heart and thoughts and I do read your journals. I just don\'t know how to respond to them when my own heart and spirit are so broken right now. I hope you understand. All my love, Adrianne
So sorry to hear negative comments have been made. I believe we don\'t have to agree with all just offer support. Your summer sounds pretty busy to me. Hope you enjoy every minute of it. Love and hugs Cathy
As the rest, I hope I wasn\'t guilty of negative comments. I really try to be positive with everyone. You know, something that has helped me with my moods is exercise. A good walk can do wonders, especially in the morning when the sun is rising or in the evening during sunset. It\'s nice and peaceful. I wonder if that would help you with your sleep too. Maybe worth a try. I think hormones, besides our grief, play into the lack of sleep also. I have found that Tylenol Sleep helps. Anyway, it sounds like your camping trip will be a nice get-away for you, especially with your biddy buddies there. Try to enjoy the rest of your summer - get a good book and lounge in your pool as much as you can. I hope you have a good school year this year. It\'s just around the corner. Love, Julia