(Wed. night)  A few positives in my life today....The life insurance is going to pay.  We have waited nearly 6 months to find out.  It is just enough to pay for the funeral and get a headstone.  The check should come this week and I should be able to order the headstone this weekend.  And, my husband got a new job!  Whew!  We rent a business building out in Springfield and that has been very helpful but with taxes, etc. on the way it has been pretty scary.  I work as a Teacher's Asst. in public school.  We don't make much.  The job my husband got is not high paying but that is ok.  We are not fancy people and don't require a lot of money.  An occasional dinner out and a movie is my idea of a good time.  I much prefer, even before Scott died, to be at home and entertain here.  However, I don't even entertain anymore. I barely cook now.  Craig is going to work at a local hospital in the Groundskeeping Dept.  Many years ago I worked in that hospital. Old contacts/friends proved helpful.  He will have full health benefits, vacations, and holidays.  He grew up on a farm and we still live on one so I think this is a good fit for him.  The health benefits are huge to us.  Today, when he was getting his UA, his blood pressure was 160/110!  That scares me.  He never had problems before.  He is a couple of months behind me in his grief, though.  And he has really been stressing about finances.  I think it all plays a part.  Plus, like I said, I don't cook much anymore.  Guess I will have to really get started again.  I have always, before, cooked fairly healthy, balanced, meals.  He doesn't cook so the poor guy has lived on lots of sandwiches and frozen pizza the past few months. He is the youngest of 3...2 older sisters.  Living on a farm the girls helped inside and he helped outside.  Cooking was just not in his agenda. I have been  finally starting to cook a little more, even baking cookies the other night. Now I have to get serious to get him healthy.  Lots of love to everyone here.  You all help me more than you can imagine.