Today was so-so.  I slept pretty late and that was good.  Then I took some more stuff to my oldest sons house.  I sat around and visited with him while he painted.  That was nice.  Usually I would be the one working while he sat around.  Later, he took me to dinner.  Then we went to my moms to get a dining room table/chairs for him.  It was very nice to have a few hours of one on one with him.  My husband has been acting really strange today.  I haven't seen him much since I was gone a lot.  I don't have a lot of energy to worry about it but I am concerned he is falling into a depression that most of us moms already know so well.  We are, for sure, at different places in our grief.  Maybe its just a "man thing" that they don't try as hard as women to reach out and at least try to find ways to deal with this.  I don't know.  And I know he is very concerned about his lack of a job.  I am also concerned about that.  I may have to "force" him to see a Dr. and get some meds.  I went to the cemetery before I went to Chris'.  I found 2 fake rocks with bugs on them. (like stained glass)  I took them to him.  When he was little we had to stop and check out every insect we saw.  One of his nicknames was Bug.  I miss him so much.