So, one of the high school acquaintances that I'm friends with on FB got engaged the other day. I'm actually really happy for her, she'd been seeing someone for quite the period of time...I'm tempted to say 5 years? But I made sure I sent her congratulations, because her relationship with this guy -- not me -- had been driving her cuckoo to this end.
In a way, though, it's also making me feel depressed. All my siblings have either married or are going to be married, and a good chunk of my FB friends (some of which are also here at DS) have also married or are going to be married soon. I can't see myself ever having a relationship going that far. It just doesn't sound like me, and on top of that it's becoming more and more obvious that I have to pretty much choose my company.
My parents invited me to go to the Topsfield Fair with them today...which got nowhere. I simply refused, but I didn't say what was REALLY going through my head. I've heard enough about it -- it's a major agricultural event -- to know that it's likely going to be crowded...and that means I would want an entire team of rent-a-cops to watch my back.
Come to think of it, that image of my parents being bodyguards has pretty much vanished into thin air as well.
I was trying to work on my LinkedIn profile earlier, but it's awfully hard to zero in on that when you're having a hard time accepting that a social life outside of your day job is simply not for you when it seems like everyone else has one. :(
Upcoming YouTube project: Summer Games, Atari 2600 version. 20 years later, I'm still no match for the pommel horse event. But that won't stop me from doing an 8-player(!) longplay, solo.
In a way, though, it's also making me feel depressed. All my siblings have either married or are going to be married, and a good chunk of my FB friends (some of which are also here at DS) have also married or are going to be married soon. I can't see myself ever having a relationship going that far. It just doesn't sound like me, and on top of that it's becoming more and more obvious that I have to pretty much choose my company.
My parents invited me to go to the Topsfield Fair with them today...which got nowhere. I simply refused, but I didn't say what was REALLY going through my head. I've heard enough about it -- it's a major agricultural event -- to know that it's likely going to be crowded...and that means I would want an entire team of rent-a-cops to watch my back.
Come to think of it, that image of my parents being bodyguards has pretty much vanished into thin air as well.
I was trying to work on my LinkedIn profile earlier, but it's awfully hard to zero in on that when you're having a hard time accepting that a social life outside of your day job is simply not for you when it seems like everyone else has one. :(
Upcoming YouTube project: Summer Games, Atari 2600 version. 20 years later, I'm still no match for the pommel horse event. But that won't stop me from doing an 8-player(!) longplay, solo.
Replies
I was just thinking of my social life too yesterday --non existent!
You say your friends are married or getting married. I am married and trust me sometimes I am lonelier than when I was single.
Hubby and I have a very easy trip last week lots of time to be together. We never talked at all. I got up last night and cried because I was so lonely and just wanted to hear someone\'s voice so badly I wanted someone to notice me.
Just wanted you to know I understand and can sympathize.
Wish I had advice but sadly I just don\'t know what the answers are.
Just know I care. hugs