I owe making it through yesterday to a couple of my friends who were willing to talk outside of DS, one in particular gave so many hugs it would have been serious over hugging if not for the fact that I felt so bad.
One thing that did come up is that it feels like over the last year I really haven't conquered any if my issues...not anything close, really. The friend who unloaded all the hugs came back to me this morning saying that she feels conquering is too strong a target right now; she wonders if it wouldn't hurt to see it that she does, in terms of handling hurdles as they come.
That might make more sense given where my self esteem is (which is very lacking), but...but...(sigh). If it's not about conquering issues -- and the hurdles concept sounds just as hard because that tends to break me as well...what is it really about? What is it going to take to convince me that I've gotten somewhere?
I really don't know. Do you?
One thing that did come up is that it feels like over the last year I really haven't conquered any if my issues...not anything close, really. The friend who unloaded all the hugs came back to me this morning saying that she feels conquering is too strong a target right now; she wonders if it wouldn't hurt to see it that she does, in terms of handling hurdles as they come.
That might make more sense given where my self esteem is (which is very lacking), but...but...(sigh). If it's not about conquering issues -- and the hurdles concept sounds just as hard because that tends to break me as well...what is it really about? What is it going to take to convince me that I've gotten somewhere?
I really don't know. Do you?
Replies
What it will take is really looking at where you were a year ago. Were you able to talk to someone on the phone without being worried about it? Were you able to open up to someone? To trust them with some of the things that you have been hiding for a very long time? Were you on a course studying for your certificate to go to somewhere completely new in your life? Were you able to admit to your problems and try to tackle them?
Another way to think of it is this, if you were climbing Everest you wouldn\'t look to the summit first. I mean, you know that it\'s there, you know that is where you are going to reach, but first you have to climb to and establish base camp.
From base camp the next stage of the journey is to set attainable goals that can be reached in time for you to make the next camp. Some days there will be storms that mean you have to sit in your tent and ride it out. But you will continue to slowly move up that moutain to the summit
And then when you reach the summit you will know that you have achieved more than you thought that you could, and you will know that you did it with a team of friends who are here for you through thick and thin
xxx