The last couple of days have been rough rides...I've been dealing with a head cold. It's not immobilizing, but it's playing games with my focus and I've had to go to bed early. Tonight isn't going to any exception to that.
So, there's one detail I left out of that story from Friday: One girl did notice that I was struggling in more ways than one; she found me in the middle of a breakdown in the hall outside the lab zone. She asked if there was something she could do to help, but I was at a loss for words, I was so scared of her even though she said she was just in class with me.
This is going far outside the comfort zone that I have, but when the class meets again on Thursday, I'm pretty much going to have to seek her out and ask if she can help. Problem is, I really only have one shot: If for any reason it fails, I'm pretty much reduced to going on a tutorial video hunt via Youtube, and as I've conceded before with the bad rep males have in my mind only a female tutor would work for me right now...can you imagine what a crap shoot that's going to be?
If getting over the head cold doesn't give me trouble the next 48 hours, anxiety over this will. After Friday's very dark episode, the odds I can actually get a study buddy are very slim (I'm thinking only 5-10 percent at best). The video option could work but offers no ground towards my people issues so I really don't want to go there, but the scope of what it is I apparently have to do just...feels...too...big...
So, there's one detail I left out of that story from Friday: One girl did notice that I was struggling in more ways than one; she found me in the middle of a breakdown in the hall outside the lab zone. She asked if there was something she could do to help, but I was at a loss for words, I was so scared of her even though she said she was just in class with me.
This is going far outside the comfort zone that I have, but when the class meets again on Thursday, I'm pretty much going to have to seek her out and ask if she can help. Problem is, I really only have one shot: If for any reason it fails, I'm pretty much reduced to going on a tutorial video hunt via Youtube, and as I've conceded before with the bad rep males have in my mind only a female tutor would work for me right now...can you imagine what a crap shoot that's going to be?
If getting over the head cold doesn't give me trouble the next 48 hours, anxiety over this will. After Friday's very dark episode, the odds I can actually get a study buddy are very slim (I'm thinking only 5-10 percent at best). The video option could work but offers no ground towards my people issues so I really don't want to go there, but the scope of what it is I apparently have to do just...feels...too...big...
Replies
Hey friend...I think it\'s really awesome that she stopped and asked if you were okay...that might be a tool, you know? Something you can use to remind yourself that most people are safe :) but I wish you luck on the tutoring...I know that can\'t be easy to find, for anybody, and I understand how difficult it is for you...wishing you peace as always
you should ask her, she offered her assistance and if you need it accept it :D As for the bad rep thing, that rep is normally only associated to those player types who only seek help just to try to get her attention and get her in bed. I don\'t think most tutors on the whole even think about that senario and if you are primarily meeting in a public facility then there is little need for any red flags to go up on her side. I think you will do fine, but if that cold don\'t let up definitelly get it looked at.
Said cold is letting up, which is a good thing as you say Wyndy. There\'s an update to this now: A classmate in my family law class has noticed that I\'m struggling to find help and said I should contact the dean of the science department and ask her if anything can be done as far as help options go because I don\'t even see my course listed on the tutoring center and trying to work with the professor is just a no-go not because of his style but I can\'t get to him. I just e-mailed her because I have to concede that I just don\'t think talking to my chemistry classmate is going to work out; I\'m getting some very bad vibes from my heart.
well i am a fan of the follow your heart mentality, the hard part is actually seperating your heart from a trick of the mind. I would agree with that person though, the chair of that department should be able to find some help. It may simply be a senior studend, but help is help anyway you can get it :D
Here\'s the scary part: On what is effectively the eve of the day before I must make a move one way or another, I still don\'t have a response and it\'s 1:30 pm. Youtube is out there as a backup option thanks to feedback from friends and so I am typing what notes I can to free up time to go hunting if I must, but I have to say I am...not happy with how this is looking. It shouldn\'t have to be this hard to get help, but for me it is and somehow it just doesn\'t feel fair even though some of this can be blamed on my inability to work around my quirks as they stand right now.
you cant really expect a response from that person probably for at least 72 hours. when i was in college the chair of my program recieved on average 120 student e-mails per day. Depending on meetings and professional requirements it would take him a good deal of time to get back to the students though he made sure that by friday before he went home he had viewed every one of them. It takes a good amount of time. those people for all intents and purposes are executives of thier collegate group. As such a good number of responsibilities. I would say if you have not heard within a week, then odds are you won\'t.