As I type this I'm about to go to the doctor's office for a check of my thyroid levels (I'm on medication for that).
With the way I've been feeling about myself lately -- goal cleared this week or not -- I'm also going to have to discuss the possibility of going on medication again for this (expletive) depression.
The difference this time is that the first time I was on meds I still wasn't really aware of the specific problems and triggers that I have, so the med was really just acting as a mask.  That made it useless for my purposes.  This time I have a much better idea and I have more people to thank for that than would be practical to name here.  You people are terrific.
So why the meds now?  Well, I'd prefer counseling, but since I'm still going to be working part-time once fall classes start, I'm going to be busy enough as it is...plus there are still can't-get-there-from-here and trust issues going on.  The only place I feel comfortable talking is here.  And that given, while I understand what the problems are now, working through them is going to be another story...it's going to be very hard because they're so entrenched.
I shouldn't be saying this but I'm going to have to find a way to make visits here during the fall.  I have to.  There are no other outlets right now.