Hey everybody, saw my Doctor today and we are going to try something different for the nightmare, panic thing. I'll let you all know if it works. This site and all of my friends here is helping and I can truly say I LOVE each one of you. But you know if this is God's will, then, it is. I think I am trying to accept that now.... You know we are all "changed" people now. WE would have never came to this site and found each other!! We will never be the same person we were before our traumatic losses.... and I have been meeting people I would not have if this had not happened to me and have also lost some "friends" if you will, if this had not happened. Everyone thinks and says, " you have been so strong through this and they don't know how I do it".... well I'm NOT and it is showing at home and at work. Instead if saying I'm OkAY when someone asks how I'm doing I am now telling them (family and friends) that I am going through a horrible time right now, it is all I can do to straighten, not clean my house, simply paying my bills is a mental struggle my thoughts are so scattered, I cry everyday, throw up at least 3-4 times a week, I weigh around 200 and I have lost (and needed to) about 15 lbs since Sept. I quit my job, am filing for SSI, basically my Doctor told me I have had a nervous breakdown.... And since I am not hiding it anymore and I feel a little better. Losing my child has been the most hurtful, agonizing, overwhelming, unreal, sickening thing I have ever been through, and I have been through alot of other hurtful things but this one has KICKED MY BUTT.... And thanks for listening that felt good to say that too!! Love and Prayers to everyone here, your are my special buddies!!
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I understand...my loss brought me to my knees. Hand in there we understand. Good job getting help for the lac of good sleep and panic issues. I saw my doctor & it has helped me...I hope it still works and I don\'t have to keep changing medication. Take care.
My counselor recommended that some medical intervention may be needed for me. I\'m going through everything you so eloquently wrote here. I\'m surprised that I don\'t have holes in the wall from where I punched them. It\'s weird because I don\'t want to cry in front of people because I don\'t want them to feel uncomfortable. When people ask me how I\'m doing, my reply is, \"I\'ve been better.\" I wouldn\'t recommend the grief diet, either. Thank you for sharing your experience with me because it really does give me some comfort. Take care sweetie - you are in my thoughts! Thank God for the special people I have found here.