I was able to get out and go see a friends new apt today. I almost bailed because I felt the usual depression and didn't want to be a "drag" - but I went anyway and it wasn't so bad. I am grateful I can maintain at least one friendship, and that I have a kind and understanding friend. I wish I didn't feel like shit every day, and I wish I didn't live alone. But I am glad that I have a place to live, sometimes even that is touch and go - but so far I've been able to keep it. I wish my life would improve.