My whole future is in jepardy, no kids, no house.everything I have ever wanted in life has been ripped out from under me... places I said I'd never go back to have consumed me once again. yet hes upset about his pay rise not being as much as he was first told. hes rung his whole family and some friends, plastered it over social media  been going on about it all afternoon and heres me....still trying to come to terms with being barren, sick, depressed and feeling so useless....I keep having to stop myself in EVERY conversation, every single one. because it ALWAYS is about kids, house and marrige with me and now it can be no longer... so all my analagies are changing, my comparrisons are different and If i miss my birthcontrol pill what the fk does it matter... cant hold a pregnancy anyways.... to decipher my ranting, I have been very recently diagnosed with Sjogrens meaning my dream of marriage, kids and a house has been pretty much ripped from under me, I can possibly pass on my disease OR any fetus can be born with  congenital heart disease which can range from random skipping heart(totally non threatening) to needing a pacemaker... as a newborn! Also, if i did decide to have kids, I would suffer misscarrriages... often.