Today

Hard day today already, i just want to sit and cry.  Jakes death is not what is holding me back its the effects that his death had on my body.  I am tired of fighting those things.  I know where my son is and he is in the arms of Jesus and he is in a perfect place but all the sickness that happened from not eating and gaining weight from not eating and  all the way down to us losing our house and my husband was out of work for over a year. 
I have started school, i needed to do something and i like that but the job market around here is not great.  My dad won't come out of his bedroom rarely after Jakes death, the business went under that we ran and my parents are having it tough too.  The burdens are too many and Jesus said he would never leave us or for us to bare too much but i think i have reached my limit for i am tired.

Replies

Livingjuicy
Livingjuicy

This does feel like so much. I\'m sorry... do what you can for yourself as you are each day. I hope some glimmers of light and relief will be yours. A friend reminded me to, \"Breathe in, breathe, out...\" Somedays that is the only thing that I feel I am doing \"right.\" Continued healing and loving care sent your way. Joanie
RememberKala
RememberKala

Oh Dawn, I feel your exhaustion and pain, it comes through your words so clearly. Sometimes it does seem as though everything horrible is thrown at us all at once. I know for me, when I\'m feeling totally overwhelmed by so many elements, I have to just simply stop, breathe, and focus on one task at a time. I know, I know, in today\'s world we\'re told to multi-task, and I know there are so many things that need to be tended to at once. But the truth is if we let ourselves become completely depleted of energy and health, what have we left to give? The greatest gift you can give your family is a healthy you!

I think it\'s wonderful that you\'ve decided to go back to school...enriching the mind is a positive thing. Just don\'t let it become one more \"job\" for you.

Holy Spirit of Love and Truth, surround my precious friend with rest, health, and insight. May the perfect love of Jake be ever present to provide an undeniable joy within her spirit. May her father find the power of love within himself to step more frequently outside of his bedroom so his days can be filled with the beauty that is his family. May her husband be successful in finding that perfect job which brings not only financial security, but self improvement and opportunities to reach out to others. Thank you Spirit for your love and guideance.
DianaLynn
DianaLynn

hugging u tight my friend~~sending you strength to keep positive and got u in my prayers and thoughts...
i know so well of having a rough time of it...its been one thing after another and totally has me drained mentally and phycially...but i know our sonshines our angels are watching over us...!!..hang in there and keep a smile on your face and head up high...and may god overflow us all with the things we are in need of and give us the strength to face each day and suceed ...hugs and love and strength coming ur way...luv ya
biowoman
biowoman

You know, it is amazing the effects of losing a child has on all avenues of our life...it truly touches everything. I hope that things begin to settle down for you and that bit by bit things will be restored. love to you...Karen
Robin4
Robin4

I certainly agree that the after affects of such a huge loss leave us emotionally, physically and spiritualy drained. I agree with the others....just do what you can do. When you can do more, then do more. Take care of yourself and how wonderful to better your situation by continuing your education. There may not be work now but I know it will have to get better one day. Keep that light at the end of the tunnel to guide you. Love to you. Robin
soulnpain
soulnpain

Thank you all so much and i love you all for caring and taking the time to write and encourage me. My husband is working now but the effects there have taken its tole. God Bless you all and love you all
ColleenF
ColleenF

I\'m so sorry that you are still having it so tough. We need to work on getting you healthy. Have you moved yet? Have you thought about maybe moving a little closer into town or is that out of the question? It would just be so much easier job wise. I will see you soon. My hours have changed to 8:30--5:30 M-F. but call me anytime. I love you, Colleen
soulnpain
soulnpain

Thanks Colleen i will and thank you all for the encouragement