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i so need to cut right now, feel's like i'm gonna implode and i just don't know what the hell to do. am i lost forever.i don't know where to turn anymore and i fear this will break me,i don't want to harm but i don't think i can stop this urge anymore.please god put me out of this misery. this hell has gone on long enough.i can no longer depend on myself to be part of the team,if i cannot be depended on to do my job, to find the fastest,most effective way to do my job then i do not deserve this job or this life,i won't let my team down this time.i just don't have the fight anymore, so if i walk away then everything will be how its supposed to be.i will cause no more suffering to them or anyone else.i believe what i do shall be the right thing for me and for everyone around me....