Lord plz give me rest.  And plz 2morrw help me 2 keep it 2gether and keep focused on the interview.  plz bless me 2 b on time & 2 show my positive traits and attributes.bless me 2 articulate efficiently and eloquently.  plz bless me with this position if it is good 4 me so that i can nt b surrounded by "fam" at work and can nt share what im going through.  give me something else that is separate from my h so that i will perhaps think of him and this sirtuation less.  thank u 4 the ability 2 think. im sad im grieving im trying nt 2 lose my mind.  im strugglin. tryin 2 rest when i nd 2.  im leaning 2ward working on this but i dont think i can keep it 2gether and continue 2 live with him.  i think i nd 2 go.  i nd a change of venue.  i nd my own space.  im afraid that he wont change.  whats been hapenning aint workin.  pastor sd dont throw the baby out with the bath water.  is the baby the marriage?  the bathwater is the affair and all that made our relationship not work.  theres just no winning here.  if i get my own place it will help meexpress my independence but i will have 2 b at the house often 2 take care of children. i wanna have an affair with me.  i wanna get reaquainted with the individual me.  and then decide if i wanna reconcile.  im leaning in that direction.  im afraid 2 though.  another set of bills.